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Contentment in the moment makes life more enjoyable

Woman in motorcycle outfit sitting next to a tree
Ulrika Sandén, taking a break from driving her motorcycle. Photo:Kennet Ruona.

She has survived a brain tumour and hates empty phrases such as “seize the day” and “live in the present”. Despite this, after the tumour operation Ulrika Sandén both researched and wrote a book on what she calls “Contentment in the moment”, an approach to life that she assimilated during her years in Vesterålen in northern Norway.

“The present can be terrible. It’s more a matter of affecting the present, so that you can have as many good moments as possible. Then at least you have enjoyed yourself.”

The summer her world her world fell apart

The summer of 2004 was cold and rainy. The poor holiday weather was an obvious conversation topic. For Ulrika Sandén, who was then 30 years old, it was the summer when her world fell apart.

She was told that she had a serious brain tumour. Only one week later she woke up from the operation with a brain that no longer worked as it had before. Almost all the memories from the eight previous years had been erased. Her short-term memory had been destroyed, she could not find her way home and bought the same three products every time she went to the grocery store – kidney beans, tuna fish in oil and chilli sauce. When reading, she lost the thread in anything more than a short news item.

She was told that it was a slow-growing tumour, which in her case meant that it would probably come back within five to ten years. During the sensitive period when the brain was to heal after the operation she was not to be subjected to stress. Her partner of six years then decided to leave her and she hit rock bottom.

Woman paddling in kayak. Snocapped mountain in the background
Ulrika Sandén, paddling in northern Norway. Photo:Bent Bakkan

She is an exception

Today, 15 years later, Ulrika Sandén is nearing completion of her doctoral thesis in Design Sciences at the Ingvar Kamprad Design Centre IKDC. She is living in a new relationship, has started to ride a motorcycle and likes pizza and beer. She is an exception – the tumour has not returned. The way back, firstly to a functioning everyday life and then to academia, required extraordinary determination.

“It’s said that you need endurance to take a doctorate, but if you try ten years’ of brain damage rehabilitation first, it’s nothing”, says Ulrika Sandén.

Furthermore, she is often happy – or content in the moment.

Moved to northern Norway

Some years after the brain operation she wanted to have an adventure. It turned out to be a job and move to Vesterålen, north of Lofoten in northern Norway.

“The landscape was magical. The first morning in my new house I looked out over the fjord and at the sparkling snow-capped mountains from all the windows.”

However, it was not the dramatic landscape, but the people and sense of community in the countryside that turned out to be most important for her own wellbeing.

“I thought that the people of Polarfjorden had a way of enjoying the little things in life and I wanted to know the reason for it. Therefore, I chose to examine it in my Master’s thesis in social work.”

 

Old survival strategies in Vesterålen give today's residents satisfaction

For many generations, life has been dangerous up in Vesterålen – or Polarfjorden as Ulrika calls it in the book. Many men died at sea or because there was no healthcare. The people who lived there helped each other to survive in the dark, cold and storms. Most of the men were fishermen and were at sea for a month at a time. When they were away, the women struggled with the farm.

“When the men were away you didn’t think about them and didn’t talk about them at all. What would happen to the farm if you went around being worried?”

Not worrying so much about things that you cannot control is, she contends, something that has persisted among the people in the countryside. In her Master’s thesis, she tries to investigate how old survival strategies in isolated, poor northern Norway have been inherited and give today’s Polarfjorden residents satisfaction. The Master’s thesis was then reworked to become her very first research article and that was how her research began. Furthermore, the article won a prize for the year’s best article awarded by the Swedish Sociological Association.

And now she wants, without preaching, to convey an alternative way of living – hence the newly published autobiography Contentment in the moment – to hope is to die a little.

“I wrote the book because I believe in mixed methods, even when it’s a question of communicating research. The book is more direct – it can create emotions and thoughts about another type of life.”

A motorcycle driving a winding road through fields
In Lund, Ulrika has also found ways to be immersed in the moment. One of them is driving a motorcycle.Photo:Kennet Ruona

Strong sense of community meant a lot

The strong sense of community in Polarfjorden meant a lot for Ulrika Sandén’s wellbeing. As a new arrival, she was asked to come along to the bathing club, hike in the mountains, go paddling in a kayak or go skiing. Above all, she was always welcome to visit the neighbours and friends for a cup of coffee, and people dropped in on her at home in the kitchen. Without knocking.

“It took time for me to get used to it – but I have never been so clearly included in a community.”

Ulrika Sandén considers that the helpful mentality lives on today. Everyone is expected to drop what they are doing if someone needs help. When she drove into a ditch on a very snowy day, ten cars stopped and everyone helped until the car was back up on the road again. To be needed and to know that the people around you will help you and socialise with you regardless of what happens – for example if you are ill for a long time – was a great source of security.

Party people

The people of Polarfjorden also liked to party. Parties just happen, people turn up or call and ask if they can come by – with a bag-in-box. And everyone is welcome.

“I turned into a reveller in Polarfjorden. There was a big difference compared to very controlled dinners and the checking of diaries to make plans that happens back in Sweden.”

Serious matters were not dwelt upon

During her time in Norway, Ulrika developed muscle problems, her energy suddenly dipped and the condition of her legs deteriorated. It could have been a sign that the tumour was back or of a serious secondary disease in the wake of the brain operation. Among her friends in the countryside she felt that all emotions could be shown in company – but that serious matters were not dwelt on.

“When I talked about my symptoms they listened – but didn’t ask any subsequent questions. And if that happens, it’s difficult to dwell on it. They also have an expression ‘that’s done with’, which is often used to indicate that a subject is now understood and closed.”  

Instead they dropped in at the house a little more and took Ulrika out on a lot of activities that they were currently involved in – when she could

“That, if anything, was a confirmation that I and my time was valuable.”

Another frequently used expression among Polarfjorden residents was “heldig” ­– fortunate. Immediately after a difficult and serious subject had been discussed, they often mentioned how thankful they were for something else at the moment – nature, the sun shining, children, friends.

“The whole time they took me to the present moment. In Sweden, people often focus on hoping for something and that necessitates not giving up. But, if you are hoping for something your thoughts are about the future, and focusing on the future means you die a little in the moment.”

"Nobel prize winners and other authorities are just people"

During the summer there was not much of a break from the research.

“I want to think and research as much as I can – because I don’t know how long I will be able to do it. On the other hand, I am not so unlike everyone else – nobody knows how much time they have left.”

Her memory plays up sometimes. However, she does not want to expend energy thinking about whether she is healthy or ill – and the research is going well.

“I probably read less than most other doctoral students, it’s still strenuous. But I have found it easy to write the whole time. I am focused on finding answers to the questions I think are important.”

The interdisciplinary research she conducts in Design Sciences concerns the improvement of cancer care and rehabilitation based on the patient’s entire experience – what they need in order to feel as well as possible during a turbulent time in their lives. She has three supervisors from different fields – medicine, design and sociology.

“I see myself like a child of divorce, who gets different advice and perspectives. And then, ultimately, it’s up to me to choose which I will follow.”

She has active collaborations with researchers in Finland and cancer rehabilitation at Lydiagården in Höör. She wants to achieve a lot and does not hesitate to contact or even criticise world authorities.

“There is not much that scares you when you have had a brain tumour. Nobel Prize winners and other authorities are just people and actually they usually appreciate the exchange.”

"Security is knowing you can handle whatever comes your way"

Together with Fredrik Nilsson and other colleagues at IKDC, she was recently granted SEK 4 000 000 by the Ingvar Kamprad Foundation for the project “Digitalisation of organisational gaps in cancer care”. It concerns how today’s cancer rehabilitation can be extended with a digital continuation. Among other things, there is to be a digital portal based on people’s needs, focusing on knowledge, loneliness and how to navigate the healthcare system. It will also provide an opportunity to link up with others who have the same diagnosis, and advice on how you can feel a little better when you are ill.

“There will also be a chat room for those with morbid and black humour – joking about your disease can act as a release.”

In Lund, Ulrika has also found ways to be immersed in the moment, even though the landscape is not as dramatic or close at hand in Lund as it was in Polarfjorden.

“I have started to ride a motorbike. It’s perfect, because you can’t think about anything else when you are driving. And then there is my research – where I often find myself in the flow.”

Security for Ulrika Sandén is not to hope that she will be completely well and live to be one hundred years old.

“Security is knowing that you can handle whatever comes your way. But, who knows, I am beginning to think that I will perhaps outlive you all…

                                

*The research article is entitled “Contentment in the moment. A grounded theory about life choices and survival strategies”

 

 

 

Psychosocial cornerstones for contentment in the moment

Inclusiveness. Open sense of community where everyone is welcome.
Helpfulness. A practical, down-to-earth attitude – people are expected to help each other.
“Heldig”. Feeling grateful and expressing it often.
That’s done with. Listen carefully but all the same don’t dwell on things you cannot influence.
Focus on the present. What can we do right now that is enjoyable, pleasant, nice?
Fun. Choose to spend time and energy on friends, exercise, being out in the countryside, having a party.
Time. Every moment means a new opportunity to make something better.

cover photo

About LUM

The first edition of Lund University Magazine – LUM – was published 1968. Today, the magazine reaches all employees and also people outside the university. The magazine is published six times per year. Editor Jan Olsson.

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Jan Olsson


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Minna Wallén-Widung

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